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It’s All Getting A Little Bit Complicated Isn’t It…

August 31, 2012

I’m building a pretty good relationship with my GP right now, I guess that’s a positive to come out of this crappy situation!
“It’s All Getting A Little Bit Complicated Isn’t It…”  is how he greeted me today when I went for my appointment, “Is it? I’m really not sure what’s going on right now!” was my weary reply.  He explained that, yes, in addition to the uveitis in the eyes, the Renal people suspect vasculitis is underlying in the kidneys too and I’ll just need close monitoring for it.   On a plus side my blood pressure was normal and the kidney function is looking ok at the moment. So off I went with a 3 page prescription and with the promise of more temazepam should I need it.

I had my MRI scan on Wednesday, I survived but it wasn’t the best experience I’ve ever had.  I clenched my eyes shut as they put me in the tube, but as soon as I sensed I was in there I had a complete panic attack and had to be pulled out.  They let my husband come in the room and I think just knowing he was there helped with the anxiety because I managed to cope when they put me back in.   They played my Rumer CD and I zoned into it despite the horrible clunking noise all around me, until I realied my ring finger was vibrating furiously and that I still had my wedding ring on and I wasn’t meant to have metal in the MRI then I freaked out and convinced myself I was now going to get some MRI-magnet-metal-induced-disease!  Fortunately the radiographer said it wasn’t a problem and not to worry.   My husband, sitting outside the scanner, had taken his belt off but had forgotten to take his watch off and the magnet was so strong it stopped his watch during the scan (fortunately it’s working again now).  What MRI novices we are! 

I am starting to come to terms with the fact that my life will never be “back to normal”, I’m not going to be healthy and well again like I have been until now.  I am going to have to live my life on high levels of powerful drugs and I am going to be a regular visitor to Newcastle hospitals and the GP surgery.  I might have to add my doctor’s to my Christmas card list – I certainly see more of them than my friends these days. 

Anyway, after 2 nights of no sleep I am treating myself to sleeping pills tonight – tomorrow is my birthday and I’m determined not to feel rubbish all day – a good night’s sleep should help with that.

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